If you thought you read the title wrong, rest assured that you did not. It may sound bizarre (almost like an oxymoron) because an obsession is a preoccupation while inattentiveness is an inability to focus. However, this condition recently was brought to my attention by someone who nearly drove all her companions and associates nuts. Here is how it all went down.
Let’s start with a brief background. I’ll call the person being discussed Di. Di is diagnosed with ADHD and has taken medication for it since she was about 7-8 years old. Not surprisingly, as with most people who have this diagnosis, finding the correct medication and dosage for treatment is a process of trial and error. This was no different than with Di. Unfortunately, some years after finding an effective medication, big money interfered. The insurance company decided to no longer pay for her medication. She was switched to what is suspected to be a less expensive medication for the insurance company but one that had less efficiency on symptoms. With no other choice, she muddled through.
When she turned twenty-one, for some reason, insurance companies presumed that her ADHD vanished. I imagine this is for many reasons, one being that the insurance companies probably do not want to pay for it. Second, since most twenty-one-year-olds are no longer enrolled in school or are about to graduate college, complaints about classroom disruptions and poor grades are no longer issues. Also, the classification of drugs typically used to treat ADHD are controlled substances which means they can be addictive, are frequently abused, and are sold illegally for recreational use.
Adult ADHD is commonly misunderstood because it can present itself differently from childhood symptoms. Because an adult may recognize the inappropriateness of hyperactivity and seemingly are able to control it, many erroneously believe that the person outgrew it. Empirical research has demonstrated that this isn’t generally the case. As a person grows older, they learn coping skills. Therefore, symptoms are often masked but not controlled. For example, a child with a lot of motor restlessness may choose a profession that allows them to move around their environment as opposed to one that would have them sit behind a desk all day doing paperwork. Onlookers may not easily be able to detect that the person is struggling. However, untreated ADHD can be harmful not only to the person with the diagnosis but also to the general public. Consider an airplane pilot, school bus driver, dentist, bridge designer, or surgeon with attention issues.
Additionally, many physicians do not want to prescribe these types of narcotics to adults, and many pharmacies are weary to fill the prescriptions. Government regulations compound the issue further, making adults with this diagnosis have to jump through multiple hoops under the pretense it is to “protect” and help prevent abuse. Yet, persons who are abusing the drug have no problem obtaining them illegally.
Di fell into the unfortunate category of adulthood. Not only did she begin experiencing more difficulty in obtaining medication due to governmental regulations, but she also had to deal with the insurance companies reducing the number of medications they would pay for forcing her to switch to an even less effective medication and manufacturing shortages. Thus, she had difficulty obtaining the medication that was barely helping her. To compensate, Di began to cut her medication in half in order to have more days. In short, instead of taking two pills per day for thirty days, she would take one pill a day for sixty days. She reasoned that some relief from symptoms per day would be better than having months with symptoms not being addressed at all. As someone who knows Di, I can attest that she is not functioning as well as she should or could.
Approximately, a year ago, Di was invited to a wedding. The happy couple is scheduled to tie the knot in another town. As a young adult, Di was excited to be invited, not only because these were friends but because she had never been invited to a wedding. Her mother, of course, saw red flags and attempted to rationally discuss the matter with Di. However, anyone who has ever attempted to have a rational discussion with a person who has untreated (or inadequately treated) ADHD understands the complications and complexities of doing so. While the diagnosed person has the intelligence to understand, the processing speed and reasoning ability are disruptive. This is the nature of ADHD. It creates problems in processing information, but this doesn’t make the person less smart. It can, however, lead to poor decision-making.
Di was so excited about attending the wedding that she could focus on nothing else. One misconception about ADHD is that the sufferer has an inability to concentrate and is flighty from topic to topic. This can be true. However, it also can be that the person cannot focus on more than one piece of information at a time. A person with ADHD often is easily distracted when a lot of activity is present—sensory overload. But what equally is possible is that he/she locks in on one topic and has difficulty transitioning to other tasks. Transitioning was an area of struggle for Di from a young age. She became easily dependent on routines because they simplified life, eliminating her need to make decisions. For a person with ADHD, decision-making can be extremely difficult and distressing. Routines can dissipate the need to make decisions—just follow the yellow brick road.
Because Di’s focus became this wedding, she failed to see the implications it would have in other areas of her life. For example, she could not grasp that the time required to travel to this event would interfere with other activities. As a result, she was dismissed/terminated from a summer job before she began. Her would-have-been supervisor wasn’t willing to give her the time off, and Di had purchased a non-refundable airline ticket. Now, at the time of the ticket purchase, Di had not applied for this summer position but knew she was interested in doing so. Di’s mother attempted to warn Di of the potential conflict and encouraged Di not to make any purchases until she had a better idea of what her future plans would entail. Of course, Di failed to listen.
All Di could talk about was this wedding, and her first boyfriend (Carl—not his real name). Everything was wedding this and Carl that. She did not possess the cognitive space to appropriately process the abundance of other information in her life. For example, she frequently made careless mistakes at work, omitting important details that ultimately would require her to redo projects, thus, doubling her workload and struggling to meet deadlines. Time management issues were continuous. For example, she would engage in online shopping for outfits (because this wedding consisted of multiple events with specific dress codes for each) instead of performing necessary household chores or completing college homework assignments. She became so focused on this wedding that almost every other area of her life went to pot, and she couldn’t see it. When she encountered problems, she was distressed (and stressed-out others closest to her) but was unable to associate these problems with her obsession with attending the wedding. If someone attempted to bring it to her attention, she would argue that they were wrong. She honestly could not see the connection. She was so obsessed that she became inattentive to all else. However, she suffered from severe attention problems for years prior to being invited to this wedding. Add in that for more than a year, her ADHD had been undermedicated. Thus, it was this perfect ADHD storm.
Sadly, Di’s mother had witnessed similar behavior in the past. When Di was younger, Di took a particular interest in three activities (i.e., music, dance, and art). Di’s mother stated the following. “It would begin with one activity and rotate. I don’t remember which came first, but the experience was all the same and equally horrible. She would become fixated. Say it was art. All she would want to do was draw, and the behavior was nearly impossible to interrupt. For example, anytime we’d leave the house, we’d be late because she’d have gathered all of her drawing materials that were scattered about to bring with her. If we went out to eat, she would draw and the table and not eat. At school, she’d not finish class assignments because she was drawing. She barely would interact with people. And if interrupted or prevented, she was the crabbiest, most disagreeable child you ever wanted to encounter. She would pout, snap, and not engage. This would go on for weeks, sometimes month, but then it would fade into another activity. Instead of art, she’d focus on dance. Every time you’d look around, she’d be practicing ballet. Eventually, she’d move on to music where all she wanted to do was play her guitar or some other instrument. Then, the cycle would repeat, not necessarily in the same order or the same length of time.
“The biggest problem with her behavior was that the activities she obsessed about weren’t negative ones. She wasn’t doing drugs or physically harming herself (except for not wanting to disengage long enough to eat). So, telling her not to do these things felt wrong. However, it was the amount of time spent on these things that was the issue. Only, she could not see the many problems her behavior was causing no matter how many negative consequences she experienced or how much it was explained to her. When she was a child, I was able to intervene and force changes in her behavior. I could take away her art supplies or manipulate the environment to one that she was forced to comply with. But as an adult, I can’t do those things. When she doesn’t listen to reason, all I can do is sadly watch her experience the negative consequences. There’s no worst feeling than being helpless to help your child. Her decisions are what is causing her difficulty; yet, she is not capable of recognizing cause and effect due to her ADHD not being appropriately treated. If she was getting the right medication, I’m confident this wouldn’t be happening.
“I know it’s medication-related because we’ve been through this previously, and it took years to get it right. But once we did, it was like a miracle. She could focus without becoming obsessed. She could transition between tasks without issue. Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about ADHD—not because I wanted to but because I had to. I had teachers, superintendents, and even a pediatrician who dismissed my concerns and told me that my child was spoiled and not ADHD. It wasn’t until she started seeing a specialist that she got better. I will never forget when I first met him, and he explained to me about negative symptoms and emotional immaturity in persons diagnosed with ADHD.
“The term negative symptom isn’t what many people think. In ADHD, there are positive and negative symptoms. This doesn’t imply that one set of symptoms is good and the other is bad. Positive symptoms are those that are easily observed. For example, restlessness (e.g., running around, not remaining seated, fidgeting, etc.) is an external behavior that can be witnessed by others. Negative symptoms are ones that can’t be observed directly (i.e., boredom, frustration, etc.). Many of Di’s teachers and instructors did not believe she had ADHD because she didn’t exhibit many positive symptoms. When she didn’t respond to task demands or responded inappropriately, her behavior was labeled as spiteful and willful misconduct. In reality, she wasn’t processing the information appropriately.
“I was accused of making excuses for her, of spoiling her because she was an only child. I was blamed for having poor parenting skills. But when I met the specialist, he assured me it was the disorder and not me. He explained that what is taught in introductory psychology courses and highlighted in the media are the positive symptoms. Within a year of being treated by a special, Di went from being labeled as having one of the worse classroom behavior problems even resulting in a “reportedly” school suspension in second grade for severe disruptive behavior to being a “teacher’s pet.” By the time she entered junior high, teachers did not believe Di had ADHD for a completely different reason. She was one of the most well-behaved students in all of her classes. She made top marks, was always polite to everyone, and was well-liked. In first and second grades, her classmates found her obnoxious and didn’t want to associate with her. She was kicked out of multiple extracurricular activities. In junior high, she not only participated in social activities, she became a member of the student council and held other leadership positions. She won numerous awards and accolades. Now, all that progress is in regression.
“Actually, Di’s “obsessive” behavior has a name. It’s called “hyperfocus,” and it’s not uncommon in ADHD. Right now, it’s destroying her life. Granted, it could be much worse, but it also could be so much better. But no one is making it easy. Last year, the specialist she’d been seeing since childhood retired. She continues to be followed at the same clinic by another specialist. For the record, when she first began being seen by the specialist, the law at the time was that she had to be seen monthly. This was an issue because the specialist was in a different town, and the hours of operation meant Di had to miss school (usually not the entire day but some). I had to take off from work which didn’t always make my boss happy. Later, (when she was approximately 11 or 12) the law was changed to every three months. When she entered college, it was still every three months, but two of those visits could be virtual. My point is, her medication usage has never not been monitored (including psychological evaluations, bloodwork, teacher reports, parent reports, self-reports, and EKGs) by reputable physicians who are nationally recognized. Her need for treatment has been proven repeatedly. Yet, little by little, she’s being denied.
“I asked the pharmacist how much it would cost to pay for medication out-of-pocket since the insurance company wouldn’t and was told it would exceed more than $700.00/month. I was speechless. So, not only is my insurance which I pay monthly becoming redundant, I can’t afford to purchase it. But remember, Di will enter the workforce. What may be a personal problem now could eventually and unfortunately become one that affects others—a banker who inadvertently deposits money in the wrong account, a seamstress who incorrectly measures for wedding dress alterations, a mechanic who forgets to put back in all the screws, etc. Nothing happens in a vacuum, and sometimes it really does take a village. I feel like this is a battle that we are fighting alone, but I know there are other people who must be experiencing the same.”
So, that wraps up this post. Now, it’s your turn to sound off. What did you think? What is your take on the subject? Do you agree or disagree? Did you find this information helpful or informative? Did you learn anything new, or did it change your opinion? Let me know your thoughts in the comment section. Also, let me know if you would like me to cover more of these types of topics or dive deeper into this one. If you like this post, please click the like button and share it. Your feedback allows me to know the content that you want to read. If you’re not following me on Creole Bayou blog, what are you waiting for? There’s always room at the bayou.
Get ready. It’s time to hit the ice again. Future Goals has arrived and is available.
When a college hockey player needs the help of an attractive older attorney, he gets more than he bargained for when trying to sort out the troubles in his career. Falling in love was never part of either man’s plan, especially as Corrigan’s and Sacha’s lives should never have collided. Now they’re left questioning if they’re standing in the way of the other’s future goals, or if there’s room for redirection.
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Missed the first four books in my hockey romance series? No frets.
Out of the Penalty Box (book #1), where it is one minute in the box or a lifetime out, is available at http://amzn.to/2Bhnngw. It also can be ordered on iTunes, Nook, or Kobo. For more links on where to purchase or to read the blurb, please visit http://bit.ly/2i9SqpH.
Defending the Net (book #2) can be ordered at https://amzn.to/2N7fj8q or www.books2read.com/defending. Crossing the line could cost the game.
Ice Gladiators (book #3) is the third book in my Locker Room Love series. When the gloves come off, the games begin. Available at https://amzn.to/2TGFsyD or www.books2read.com/icegladiators.
Penalty Kill (book #4) retakes the ice. Get a copy at https://amzn.to/3ex0N9p or https://amzn.to/3ex0N9p and let the pucker begin.
For more of my stories, shenanigans, giveaways, and more, check out my blog, Creole Bayou, www.genevivechambleeconnect.wordpress.com. New posts are made on Wednesdays, and everything is raw and unscathed. Climb on in a pirogue and join me on the bayou.
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Until next time, happy reading and much romance. Laissez le bon temps rouler.
Author Bio
Genevive Chamblee resides in the bayou country where sweet tea and SEC football reign supreme. She is known for being witty (or so she thinks), getting lost anywhere beyond her front yard (the back is pushing it as she’s very geographically challenged), falling in love with shelter animals (and she adopts them), asking off-the-beaten-path questions that make one go “hmm,” and preparing home-cooked Creole meals that are as spicy as her writing. Genevive specializes in spinning steamy, romantic tales with humorous flair, diverse characters, and quirky views of love and human behavior. She also is not afraid to delve into darker romances as well.
Creole Bayou 